RAW this week starts with a video recap from last week. Batista talked about how Kane got involved in Batista’s match with Punk at GAB. He made one match so he could face Punk. He also wanted to get his hands on Kane out back. Before the match Kane comes out. Punk rescues Batista. Batista had been slammed around but wanted to fight. He was not right through the whole match and Punk had the upper hand. Then Batista caught Punk in the air and hit a spinebuster. It looked like Batista would win, but JBL got involved. Then Cena rushed in to attack JBL but clocked Batista by accident. They end up fighting until they were pulled apart.
Music and pyro.
Cena’s music and he comes stomping out looking pissed wearing his new Cenation shirt (it’s ugly). He grabs a mic and glares around to the mixed reaction that gets to be more heat as he stands there. He says he can tell by the mixed reaction that some of them know what he’s about to tell them, that he’s not perfect. The way he was raised if you make a mistake you stand up, admit it and make things right. Last week he socked Batista straight in the mouth. He knows it has some consequences. He can’t believe he’s about to do this, but he’s not on the stage or hiding out back. He’s in the ring telling Batista they can settle this right now.
Batista’s music hits and he comes stomping out to the ring. Batista climbs in slowly and they watch each other intently. He says no one knows more than him that things happen in the heat of the moment. He saw the video footage and knows Cena didn’t mean to hit him. They’re cool. Cena knows Batista likes him and respects him. After he beats Punk for the title at SS, Cena’s the first he wants to defend it against.
Cena says he doesn’t want to be the bearer of bad news, but Batista lost twice. There’s lots of guys who are up for shots and Cena’s not sure it should be Batista.
Batista says he’s not sure he should argue with his logic. The reason he’s not champion is because people keep getting involved. Punk can’t beat him. And neither can Cena.
Cena says he knows Batista’s happy to be home. The fans go wild. That’s why he knew Batista would try to sneak something like that in. There’s no law and order around these days. Batista and Cena shoulde headline WM, everyone knows that – mixed review from the crowd. Why not have WM tonight? The fans go wild. Cena says they should find out who the better man is.
Batista says they’ve never face each other one on one. He’s home and there’s lots of friends and family who’d love to see him whip Cena’s ass, so he’s on.
Shane-O-Mac’s music and he comes out to the stage. He says he and Steph have appointed a new GM of RAW. They will announce him later. He’s been busy. He hit the ground running making matches for tonight. Punk will be fighting tonight (they never say who) who’s very technically sound. While everyone would like to see Cena and Batista – Cena will be facing the tag team JBL and Kane. Cena will tag with Batista.
WWE Slam Of The Week – D-Lo beating Santino last week with the low down. Beth then enters and she and Santino exchange body locks until they end up kissing. After the kiss they both freak out and leave quickly.
Kelly comes out in a orange/red version of her normal wrestling outfit. D-Lo comes out to tag with her. Santino is out next looking a bit confused, he waits outside the ring. Video from earlier out back – Beth and Santino. He says he can’t help that she finds him attractive. It’s a curse. She says he kissed her and their relationship is strictly professional. He tells her he’s not a piece of meat and too keep her eye up here – his face. Beth comes out in her black halter jumpsuit. It’s an Inter-Gender Match.
Santino starts with D-Lo. Santino hits a sunset flip but D-Lo comes back with a clothesline to a sitting Santino. D-Lo covers for two. Beth yells at Santino to pick up D-Lo. Santino can’t. Beth tags in and picks up D-Lo. Kelly tags herself in. Forearms to Beth’s face. Beth catches Kelly and drives a knee into the back of her head.
Santino tags in. He misses his move and crotches himself. A cheap shot to D-Lo outside. Santino manages to cover Kelly for three.
– Winners: Santino & Beth
Beth and Santino shake hands. She’s upset about him rolling Beth up. She turns away and looks mad/sad. He puckers up behind her back but stops when she turns. He walks away but she grabs the back of his neck and pulls him back. He screams like a little girl until she slaps a lip lock on him. Beth then leaves Santino confused in the ring.
Video of Jeff Foxworthy on the screen talking about autism and Jenny McCarthy on SNME.
The camera zooms in on a picture of Vince. The camera backs out and Shane’s looking at it. JBL walks in and says Vince was and is a great man. He asks how Vince is. Shane asks what JBL wants. JBL says Batista lost twice and JBL pinned Cena at GAB. Shane tells him to take it up with the new GM. JBL says Shane’s a McMahon. Shane says it’s the GM’s job. JBL then says they need to know if Vince is dead or alive. Shane’s cell rings with his entrance music. Shane answers and blows JBL off.
Hacksaw comes out for a Tag Title Match. His partner – King – comes out to the ring to good pop. Video of Cody and Ted in the ring with King and Hacksaw. King slapped Cody. Another ref runs out with a note. The match has been changed by order of the new GM. King will not be tagging with Hacksaw. King’s new partner is Michael Cole. Lillian looks uncomfortable saying it and Cole looks horrified hearing it. Everyone is shocked.
The announce table is empty. Cole and King are in the ring looking shocked. Cody and Ted come out to face them. The ref explains the holding the rope part of tagging to Cole who has huge eyes.
Ted and King start. They lock up and King is backed into a corner. The ref breaks in up and King is back into the corner again. The ref breaks it up and King comes out to bitch slap Ted. Ted then gains the upper hand. Cody tags in. Ted holds King for Cody to slap him but King gets free and slaps Cody. Cody backs King into a corner and beats on him. King reverses it and beats on Cody. Cody slams King down for two. Cole looks on from the apron. Arm lock on King in the center of the ring. Cody goes up on the second ropes in a corner and flies, but King moves. Ted enters illegally but King takes him down. Back body drop to King. King gets to his feet with Cole’s help. Cody says it’s a tag and the ref agrees. They argue but King is tossed from the ring. Cole punches Cody in the nose but then Cody clothesline’s Cole for three.
– Winners: Cody & Ted
King reenters the ring to go to Cole’s side. The heels leave the ring. Video of Cole’s “tag” into the match and how he punches Cody before being take down (Cody held his nose as if he got hit there, but Cole actually hit him high on the chest).
Mike Adamle is behind the announce table – by himself! Luckily King returns to the table. Mike says he got a call earlier in the week to be in DC tonight. The new GM wanted him there but didn’t say why. Now he knows why.
Jamie Noble is in the ring. He says he doesn’t know who the new GM is, but he or she needs to know Jamie is a raising star. That’s why he brought his part time girlfriend out to Show her he’s a raising star. He deserves to be the new IC Champion. That’s why he challenged the IC Champion for tonight. He calls “Coffee” to the ring. Kofi comes out to the ring.
They lock up and Jamie back Kofi into a corner. A scoop slam to Kofi. Kofi gets whipped but gets his feet up. A huge jump and kick to Jamie’s head. Double leg drop to Jamie. Kofi bounces off a corner with a cross body onto Jamie for two. A big boot to Jamie’s head and Kofi covers for three.
– Winner: Kofi
Layla slowly climbs in the ring while Kofi leaves. She looks like she’s not sure she should go to Jamie.
Punk is out back heading for the ring.
JBL is at the announce table all pissed off. He being really pissy at Mike. Punk comes out to the ring. JBL stands and glares at Punk. Punk smirks back at him. No one knows who he’s going to face. Regal comes out to the ring! Regal is in new wrestling gear – a once piece black outfit with gold scrolling at the top, sleeveless and legless.
Side headlock on Punk. Punk forces Regal back into a back bend where his head touches the mat. Back up and they chain wrestle a bit. Punk slams Regal to the mat then gets a shoulder hold on him. Regal gets backed into a corner. Punk goes down and Regal goes out. Regal kick’s Punk in the head driving his head into a ring post. Back in the ring a full nelson on Punk. Punk is bleeding from the mouth or nose. Regal covers for two. It’s his nose and it’s really bleeding. Punk manages to cover Regal for one. Regal grabs and wrenches Punk’s nose. Forearm to Punk’s face. One shoulder lock on Punk. Punk starts to gain control with punches and kicks. Punk covers for two. Regal slams Punk down hard. Regal jumps on Punk and wrenches his arms. Somehow Punk gets Regal up and hits the GTS. Punk covers for three.
– Winner: Punk
JBL gets to his feet and into the ring. Punk’s ready for a fight but Kane’s music hits. He comes out with his sack. Punk watches both Kane and JBL. Kane enters the ring and JBL walks up to him questioning him. Kane takes JBL down. Punk goes to help JBL and JBL attacks him. Kane smirks at JBL then tilts his head to the side listening to JBL rail at him.
Y2J’s music and he comes out in a full suit and tie. Cade is in tow. This is supposed to be his final Highlight Reel. The broken Jeritron 3000 is hanging in the set. He says once again last week he came out and told the truth and was vilified for it. None of us have grown up the way he has. He’s matured and taken his career and life to a whole other level. He had to do it because of us. He wasn’t seen as an athlete but an entertainer. He did what he thought we wanted for his career, not what he wanted for his career. Even though he was the first Undisputed champion he pandered to us doing his talk Show. Instead of reaching for the brass ring he played the funny guy. So this is the last Highlight Reel. He’ll put together a tribute to a man he guarantees we’ll never see in the ring again. It’s not HBK. He’s talking about Y2J. Video of Y2J as Doink putting Regal in the walls. Showing Steph’s boob job. Y2J talking down Orton. “Brutal, bottom feeding, trash bag whore” at Steph.
He asks if we liked that because he doesn’t. He doesn’t like any of that. No matter what he does or did we wouldn’t idolize him like HBK and that’s not fair. He had to do something about it. He put HBK’s head through the tron, beat HBK down, ruined his sight and ended his career. Those are the highlights he likes. In his head he did it to all of us as well.
Cade reaches for the mic. He says it’s obvious that the fans don’t appreciate him. Before Y2J took him under his week he was floundering, stuck with a singing cowboy. Unlike HBK, Y2J saved him. He’ll be forever grateful. He appreciates Y2J.
Y2J says he appreciates Cade too. He wants HBK to listen to Y2J. He tells HBK to stay home and move on with his life. Hold onto his wife, raise his precious children. The rest is drowned out by “HBK” chants. By putting the end to HBK there’s no one more dominant than Y2J. No one deserves to face Punk at SS more than Y2J.
Piers on video talking about autism.
JR comes out to the announce table! He puts on a headset. He said he was told to be there.
Mickie comes bouncing out to the ring in orange and black. She leaves the ring to hug and kiss her dad who’s in the front row. Jillian comes out in a pink halter and black pants.
They lock up and a knee takes Mickie down. Mickie gets whipped but gets an elbow up. Mickie goes for head scissors but Jillian flips her hard so she about eats the mat. Jillian flips her around some more and then pulls her head back but the hair until the ref makes her stop. Jillian hits a converted snap mare that slams Mickie’s face to the mat. Reverse chinlock on Mickie. Jillian sings out but then gets rolled up for two. A knee to Mickie’s gut drops her. Mickie then takes Jillian down and hits some punches. Jillian ducks a kick. Mickie hits her huge DDT for three.
– Winner: Mickie
Mickie leaves the ring and goes right to her dad for a hug. Out of nowhere Katie attacks Mickie from behind. Katie blows a kiss to Mickie’s dad while Mickie is down on the mat.
Katie grabs a mic and says that to whoever the mysterious GM is, that was for him. She wants him to take notice of the next Women’s Champion and the next IC Champion.
Video of after the match when Katie attacked Mickie from behind. Katie is talking to Paul on the ramp and Mickie is still scraping herself off the floor.
SD! Rebound – Edge kissing up to Vickie. Vickie forgives him but then tells him he’ll be facing Taker in a Hell In A Cell Match at SS.
Grisham is talking to Shane says he’s glad he’s there as it’s been so crazy out back. Grisham who he is, the new GM. Shane says, “Or she.” Grisham amends his wording and asks when he or she will arrive. Shane says the new GM is already there.
JR and King go through the matches slated for SS.
Video of Jenny McCarthy talking about autism and SNME.
Cryme Tyme is out back talking to Cena. They say they’ll be down there for him if he wants. They can’t trust Batista. Batista shows up behind them.
Cena says he’ll be fine. They shake/hug and do their thing. They all say, “CTC” before Cryme Tyme leaves.
Cena says to Batista that they need to get through tonight then they can work things out.
Batista says he doesn’t trust Cena and Cena doesn’t trust Batista. Batista says they stay out of each other’s way.
Cena says he agrees.
Batista wants Cena to go first. Cena doesn’t want to Show his back. They go back and forth. Finally Cena goes, but doesn’t give his back.
JR and King say HBK will be on RAW live next week.
JBL’s limo comes out. His driver lets him out and he walks to the ring. Kane then comes out. JR says he still doesn’t know why he’s there tonight. Cena then comes out to the ring in his new shirt. Batista comes out to huge pop.
JBL kicks Cena in the gut and beats him down. Bulldog takes down JBL for two. JR says he doesn’t know where his luggage is and he doesn’t know why he’s there. Batista tags in but telegraphs. Batista then gets JBL up on his shoulder and slams him down. Kane rushes in, so Cena rushes in. They clear the ring. Cena and Batista glare at each other.
swinging neck breaker to JBL from Cena. JBL then hits a swinging neck breaker to Cena. Kane tags in and covers Cena for two. Kane punches Cena down in the heel corner. JBL makes it obvious he’s staying out of it. Chinlock on Cena in the center of the ring. The fans get behind him and he works his way up. He tries to reach Batista but gets pulled into the heel corner. JBL tags in. JBL works Cena over then tags Kane in. Cena tries to fight back. An elbow to Kane’s face but Kane comes back with a side slam for two. Kane climbs but Cena moves out of the way. Both are down.
Both Cena and Kane tag out. JBL gets whipped and clotheslined in the corner. Batista ducks a clothesline and hits a spinebuster. Kane pulls down the top rope from outside and Batista goes over the top. JBL goes outside and tosses Batista back in. JBL covers for two. Kane tags in and hits Batista in the back of the head. Shoulders to Batista’s gut in a corner. Body scissors to Batista in the center of the ring. Batista fights out and both are down. JBL (tags?) stomps in and attacks Batista from behind and a cheap shot on Cena. JBL then runs into a Batista spear. Big boot to Batista from JBL. JBL goes to hit Batista but Batista ducks and hits Kane. The ref and Kane take it as a tag. Kane tosses JBL from the ring. Cena tags himself in when Batista isn’t looking. Cena gets Kane up and hits the FU for three.
– Winners: Cena & Batista
Cena and Batista are glaring at each other in the ring. Shane-O- Mac comes out and announces the new GM. He looks over his shoulder and out back. Nothing happens.
Shane then turns to the ring and announces the new GM is Mike Adamle! Adamle is standing in the ring between Cena and Batista. The fans are not happy with this announcement at all. Adamle acts like this is the most natural thing in the world and proceeds to announce that at SS it will be Cena facing Batista. They talk – off mic – in the center of the ring.
Cody & Ted
Adamle as GM?!?!